Diddly Squat: 'Til The Cows Come Home

Welcome back to Clarksons Farm.At the end of Jeremys first year in the tractors driving seat, Diddly Squat farm rewarded him with a profit of just GBP144. Who knew, for instance, that loading a grain trailer was more demanding than flying an Apache gunship? So, while hes the first to admit that hes still only a trainee farmer*, there is clearly still work to be done.Because while hes mastered the art of moaning about nearly everything, some of the other attributes required of a successful farmer prove more of a challenge.

Or that it would have been easier to get planning permission build a nuclear power station than to turn an old barn into a farm restaurant?But if the council planning department and the local red trouser brigade seem determine to frustrate his schemes at every turn, at least hes got Lisa, Kaleb, Cheerful Charlie and Gerald, his dry-stone-walling Head of Security to see him through. That cows were more dangerous than motor-racing? And cold beer brewed with spring barley harvested from Diddly Squats own fields ...Life on Clarksons Farm may not always go according to plan.

There may not always be one. But theres not a day goes by when Jeremy cant say Ive done a thing and mean it ...* generous, in Kalebs view PRAISE FOR DIDDLY SQUATClarkson has done more for farmers in one series than Countryfile achieved in 30 yearsJames Rebanks, author of A Shepherds LifeClarkson has showcased the passion, humour and personalities of the people who work throughout the year to grow the nations food ... and brought an understanding of many of the issues faced by farmers to the British publicNational Farmers UnionA deserving Farming Champion of the YearFarmers WeeklyI dont know anything about farming.

Its like David Attenborough doing jet-skiing, or Nicholas Witchell saying, "Im going to be a cage fighter"Jeremy Clarkson